While the premise of Celebrity Bodyguard has plenty of potential, the game itself falls flat. Hobbled with no real variety in gameplay, some corny take-offs on celebrity names (Lady Bla Bla? Really?) and less-than-stellar artwork, it gets old fast — really fast. Worse, there are only three faux-celebrities to guard, meaning even if you do find the caricatures funny, they still get old. And the muttered comments of your bodyguard protagonist do nothing to add to the game’s fun factor. (“I got a really good health plan” is more head-scratching than funny.) For 99 cents, you could do worse, but it’s so much easier to do better.

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